No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
