And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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