It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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