I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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