i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
