Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
