i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
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