somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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