i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
he thought i was a dude.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize