Its about making memories worth repressing
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize