the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
