We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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