I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
