I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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