Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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