I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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