I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
