Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
