They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
