I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
