I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
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