forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Randomize
