i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
