Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize