Got a toothbrush?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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