People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
