11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Randomize
