Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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