Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
i dont even know how to be here
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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