Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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