if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
