During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
