And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
