And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize