So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
