Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
