How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
