I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
He had one of those small greek statue penises
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
