My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize