Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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