She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
