I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
