4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Randomize
