She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
