Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
