We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize
