I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize