Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
