I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
