He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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