do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
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